Post by Lochlyn Cade on Aug 21, 2021 6:37:16 GMT
"Rhodes in Twas’ the night before Chaos"
“If you utter so much as one syllable, I’LL HUNT YOU DOWN AND GUT YOU LIKE A FISH! — The Grinch
Unbeknownst to five members of the Revolution One locker room they will be heading to the family festivities a little light handed this year. Welcome to the commemorative festival of violence and anarchy. Where you’ll be leaving Christmas without a Championship or a victory of Chaos. You can call it your personal HorrorCore incubus.
It’s an entangled affair with stockings of subversion and a melody of Christmas jeer. Where all the presents are haphazardly wrapped in barbwire and ill intentions. It’s a Christmas celebration of ferocity of cookie sheets, steel chairs, and a table of fire to keep you warm and cozy.
This Christmas foray will be celebrated by the Rev1 Krampus better known as the Promethean of wrestling, the Bad Seed, and your future HorrorCore Champion.
It’s a Dorian Rhodes Christmas. Ho, Ho, Hum...
This year Dear ol’Santa will have a Rhodes map to chaos and an empty plate of cookies, Dorian don’t share. This postulated counterpart of Santa will boisterously be admonishing those within Revolution who’ve misbehaved before the season of greetings.
Amelia Hearts, Jace Knight, Cartier, Kuroi Hitsuji, Ginger Snaps
You’ve made the naughty list and Dorian Krampus doesn’t simply bend you over the knee. He’s more of a smack you over the face with barb wired two by fours and a steel chair. It’s all in the name of spreading that crimson color of the season.
Dorian Rhodes sits at a small wooden table that is surrounded by pine trees, plastic deer, and a snowy scene. The trees are covered in festive lights and ornaments. The table covered in Christmas’s traditional treats.
“Hiya, we’ve all met before but let me reintroduce you to me, Dorian Rhodes, have a seat stay awhile.
I’m unbeaten within the confines of Revolution One. I battled relentlessly to gain that elusive first win between those ropes. It took all of a mere few moments to be declared the victor of my first ever battle royal. That elusive victory was a forfeit of the entirety of Revolutions roster.
One man unbeaten. Arm raised. Humiliating all who deemed themselves to petrified at stepping between those ropes with the Promethean. It’s fact. Check the record books.
That second victory was a little more complicated and yet still just as crucial of a moment. Those that stepped between the ropes grew to realize that they should have just chosen forfeit as well. They, however, have the bruises and purple shades of humility to show their family during Christmas.”
Dorian picks up a cookie and takes a bite.
“There are those that sit in that locker room who believe they themselves are the true deserving HorrorCore Champion. I hate to be the bearer of bad news but there’s only been one Champ and he was a madman. Then there is the future Champ and you’re looking at him.
We’ve all heard the story of the red nosed reindeer and how he was left out of the reindeer games. I’m locking this hardcore division and it’s Championship down. It’s a physical denial of allowance to the entire roster of Revolution. It’s a one man division.
Dorian pulls up a huge red bag from off camera sitting it front of him. He puts his arm into the bag and digs around for a few moments before bringing his hand out. Within his closed hands is the ugliest Christmas sweater ever seen. He holds it up and out towards the camera.
“I got each of my opponents a little present so you won’t be walking out completely empty handed. These, your Rhode’s map, to victory. Yes, with these you’ll win that ugliest sweater contest on Christmas morning with your beloved family.
True, you’re still ultimately a loser. If it’s not evident now it will be come Chaos.
Sometime during that Christmas day you’ll sit down with your family and flip on that television screen. The family classic ‘It’s A Wonderful Life’ will be playing as it always does and you’ll be reminded that it’s not really always wonderful. Not on that day when you’re so fervently reminded of that championship belt around the waist of yours truly.”
Dorian reaches back into the big red bag of presents and again he pulls out something unseen. As he pulls his hand out he looks at a box of tissues, shakes his head, and tosses it over his shoulder.
“To easy.”
He reaches back into his bag and he again pulls his hand out. This time it’s empty. He looks at his hand and then turns it over as he continues looking. He glances up towards the camera.
“Well, it looks like you’ll be empty handed after Chaos as I’m out of presents and the rest of the cookies are for Santa.”
Dorian shrugs as he tosses the bag off camera.
“Jokes aside when December fifteenth comes around it’ll be a defiant moment for one and well… I’ll kinda feel bad for one Amelia Hearts. You’ve got spunk and spit fire ferocity about you.
Yeah, words clearly contradictory of what I said earlier but remember I’m only 49% villain. I’m in Revolution One because of her and yet I’ve got to ruin your moment. I’ll give you an early present though. You get the first defense when I win. That’s of course if the brass agrees.
The rest of you? You can fight among yourselves for shot number two.
Dorian tosses the last bit of cookie into his mouth and washes it down with a glass of milk.
“It’s Chaos Eve and I’m out of refreshments. I hear they will be serving some in second class this year if you book your return flight home now.
If anyone wants to bring some peppermint candy canes to Chaos I promise to take it a little lighter on you.
Ho, ho, ho and...